My name is Francis and I am thirty-nine years old. I have a background in Western Medicine. I am also a practitioner of a couple of disciplines in alternative healing method. The world of healing has always been my interest since I was a child. I consider myself fortunate enough to be able to pursue a degree in Medicine and became a specialist. Later in my life I found other healing methods, such as meditation and breathwork, which became critical for my wellbeing.
In my journey of exploring medical world, not to discredit any branch of medicine, I realize that it is incomplete. There are so much that cannot be fully explained by western medicine, and there are many conditions that simply cannot be healed by pills or surgery.
Do not get me wrong, Western medicine has gone a long way and has saved countless lives throughout human history. But it certainly is not the only way, there are other ways and some way older than Western medicine. They all have their own place in the world of healing, and they complete each other.
Although from the outside I look like a cheerful person, I have to admit that there was a time when there was a lot going on in my mind, and I had difficulties in expressing my thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Without realizing it, all the negativeness had accumulated deep inside my subconscious over time. It slowly affected my wellbeing, physical and emotional. It led to anxiety, frustration, and depression, and at some point in my life, I began to realize that I had changed a lot. I simply could not function well socially.
I was a very angry person. It felt like my anger was like a full cup of water, and when people added a few more drops, it would just spill out. I got more and more episodes of anger outburst and emotional breakdown, during which I hurt people around me with harsh words and bad behaviors that I wish I could undo. all the harsh words I regretted saying, and all the bad behaviors I wished I could undo.
In addition, there were many times I felt depressed. All the feelings of regret, self-blaming, unworthiness were pulling me in downward spiral to the point that self-harming thoughts began to pop up. During that time in my life, I felt constant anxiety, I started to have palpitations, I could not sleep well, and things that used to make me happy no longer interested me.
I considered taking anti-depressants, or at least something to numb the pain. Pills might help temporarily but deep down I know that this was not the solution. I did not want to depend on pills. This was when I started to consider alternative methods of healing. I wanted to get better and I wanted to dig deep and took care of the root cause.
Among many alternative healing techniques that I have tried, breathwork in combination with meditation worked best for me. It is simple and practical, and it delivers result immediately.
A friend introduced to a breathing technique called Ujjayi Pranayama. I was a bit skeptical at first, but I decided to try it at least for a month, so I did. Amazingly, it worked! When I do this breathing technique, I can feel myself slowly become more and more calm. The anxiety slowly dissolves. It’s like the dark lingering cloud slowly clears out, and I become more of myself again. Of course it didn’t happen at the first try. I started to feel this effect after about a week of daily practice.
About few months later, another friend introduced me to another simple technique of meditation to further calm the mind. In general, we tend to overthink, and usually subconsciously we create many negative scenarios in our head from fear-based believes in our mind, and this leads to worry, anxiety, and so on. This simple meditation technique trains us to be at the present moment, and let all the worries, the made-up scenarios, the random thoughts that distracts us, slowly fade away.
Now, whenever I feel anxious, imbalanced, or disturbed in any way, first thing I do is try to find a quiet place where I can be alone, I close my eyes and start to do the Ujjayi breathing. Usually after a few breaths calming effect begins to kick in. After I feel that my mind and body are relaxed enough, I usually continue with a little moment of meditation. I start with being aware of my breathing, focus on the present moment, let all the remaining activities in my mind being reduced to just a background noise and slowly flow away. After that I feel like I am quite refreshed, then I continue with whatever activities I was doing. The combination of breathwork and meditation usually takes five to ten minutes, so for me it is quite practical and it helps me a great deal in my daily life.
Additionally, during the weekend or whenever I have more free time, I do a longer meditation. It is the same technique but for a longer period of time. When the mind is calm, we can actually observe ourselves more profoundly, just simply observe, no judgement. Sometimes, during deep meditation some old issues buried deep in our subconscious mind can simply resurface. When this happens, embrace it, acknowledge it as part of who we are, understand it and let it go. This is where healing takes place.
Spiritual journey is deeply personal. I am grateful that in my life I have the opportunity to explore many ways of healing. We will always face challenging situations in our daily life, but one valuable lesson I have learned is that it does not matter much what happens on the outside, it matters how we react to it. Many tools are available to help us improve, we just have to choose the most suitable one. I do hope that this brief sharing of my experience could be helpful for others looking to heal.
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